Damn
It's the worst day of the month. The day before payday. I have a new bank, maybe my pay will go in at midnight. Even if it does, all the dealers will be closed. Fuckers. I have to be so sneaky typing at work, I know if they want to they can watch my screen. Today has been insanely busy, and I'm so broke I have to eat the office food. Nectarines and oranges and lattés. That's what I live on. At home, I have condiments and limp carrots. Things have been better with my boyfriend, maybe some magic is still left. It's hard knowing when I always feel so numb. His touch feels very far away.
posted by tui at 4:25 PM
1 Comments:
I can relate to the:
" Things have been better with my boyfriend, maybe some magic is still left. It's hard knowing when I always feel so numb. His touch feels very far away."
Dope'll do that to us women..and the men too but their ego's take a long time letting that one sink in. When I first used H over some 30 years ago now (holy shit that looks scary in print), anyway it was all about the cuddle and long in coming orgasms. Now..well let's put it like this..I've slowly over the years created an 'all mine' room for myself..at first it was just a private space ofr me to do my thing in..now not only do I sleep in it I hardly ever come out. We sorta pass each other on the way to other places in the house..and other places in the heart too I suppose.
Live & learn..live & learn.thing is he's straight and I often wonder how he can take it..at least I have my dope to sleep with..him..the cats don't even want to know and he's a special person. I don't get it.
Well maybe I do.
Take care chica..try not to go my way if ypu don't have too..it's not really living is it? I mean in the long run.
later then
mary
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