Friday, May 09, 2014

Squeaky clean

I had been floating along below the surface for years.

I hated being on methadone. I hated using every day.
The only thing I hated more, was not using.

I thought it was going to be like that forever. I know the stats. No one ever gets - and stays - clean.

Then I heard about ibogaine, an extract from the iboga plant, a natural hallucinogenic used to treat addiction. It was rumoured to virtually eliminate all the withdrawal symptoms while restoring healthy brain chemistry. Nothing does that.

I was out of options, so I held my breath and jumped.

The trip was like a lucid dream, with incredible detail. It showed me what I've been doing wrong, what I need to do to be happy, and how I belong in this mad world.

In less than 24 hours it had rinsed me clean of all drugs and filled me with a natural high that makes heroin seem like nothing.

As soon as I opened my eyes, I knew it had worked.

The empty ache inside me was gone.

The world was so beautiful. Is so beautiful. I just couldn't see it before.

I'm going to be okay now.

Thanks for sticking by me.


Blogger Absolut Ruiness said...

HEY TUI....!!!! (sorry for shouting out loud)......I'm so happy to see you! More-so because you have rid yourself of the pain and suffering in your life. Love you and will keep you in my thoughts today. Looking forward to reading more from you.

2:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So happy for you! It sounds like you have turned the proverbial corner. Many positive thoughts and hugs.

7:39 AM  
Blogger Erik Donald France said...

Three cheers, Tui ~ salud ~>

9:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Tui,

Been a while since I've stopped, but tonight I have and found the good news. It's a few months later and I trust all is well.

10:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hope things are still going well for you! I'm glad I could still find your blog after all this time. Cheers.

6:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Something reminded me of you and your blog and I'm so glad I managed to find it after so many years...

I hope the optimism and positivity of this post has continued and your life is as you'd wish it.

6:49 AM  
Blogger kold_kadavr_ flatliner said...

No, dear, you cannot stay 'squeeky-clean'
forever... yet, you can stay clean for
Jesus with repentance. Here's how:

1. Do you love Jesus?
2. Do you love everybody else?
Those are the 2 commandments
we must follow to git into

If you slip-up,
notta lotta prob.
Jesus understands.
We're all human.

Just trustNjesus, dear.
God bless your indelible soul.
cya Upstairs someday...

8:21 PM  
Blogger Pearl said...

I've literally followed your blog for years. Years before I was an addict myself. This gives me hope.

11:39 PM  

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