Mr Anonymous & friends
Mostly, I delete them. Sometimes I leave them. But the comments are clear, although he has never met me, Mr Anonymous loathes me. Wants me to overdose and die. In fact, a few years back, he even left a comment pretending I HAD died.
Let clear something up. I am pathetic, I suck, being a junky sucks, it is a waste of life. I agree.
I don't think anyone plans on becoming an addict, let alone dreams of being one as a child. It is scary, lonely. Something you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy.
And I'm sure I dislike myself much more than you, Mr Anonymous, ever could.
Still, I don't understand why you care so much about someone you find so pathetic. So, please fill up the comments and let me know. I'm interested.
PS
I know I'm not special, everywhere on the internet, anywhere you can post anonymously, there are hellishly mean comments. That is the internet. What people do when anonymous is a real reflection of humanity. It's eye-opening and actually pretty fucking depressing.
posted by tui at 6:50 AM
14 Comments:
Hey Tui,
glad to see you're back!!!!! I think you're very brave to make the posts that you do. I don't think you're pathetic in the least. Keep writing, my friend!
Self loathing, I guess. Some people, feel so poorly about themselves that they only feel good when they tear down another.
Most of us a rooting for you to get beyond the addiction and polish the jewel that is being obscured. Know that.
Here, here! Anonymous should focus the energy elsewhere. The lot of us think you're quite worthwhile. I most look forward to your posts. They're insightful and unique. Much like the author, perhaps.
Generally (and I find this true for myself, too) people dislike in others what they hate most about themselves. What people choose to rant over is very telling, and says much more about them than it does you.
Fuck him, love you.
Glad you do keep posting, Tui. As for anonymous humanity, the old dictum, "they who are without sin [or faults or addictions or guilt or complicities or whatever], cast the first stone" -- and if they do, preferably straight up in the air.
Recently met a homeless dude who had been hospitalized because three younger guys beat him up just for the hell of it.
Hey. I've lurked on your blog for years. Like you, I an educated professional with a very dark secret.
I wish you would post more. I'm 49 days clean today. I wish i had the guts to chronicle my struggles like you have. You probably have no idea how many people you're helping, just by being you.
I love you to pieces, whether you're clean or not. keep up the good fight, sister.
So Mr. Anonymous is the asshole we have to thank for scaring the crap out of everyone? Good job, dickhead.
I am Mr. Anonymous.
i love you Tui. i love your posts and wait for each one very very eagerly. obviuosly you are not pathetic and i certailny dont want you to OD...infact i want you to GOD(go off drugs, i know that was not decipherable). i would not read, much less comment, on somebody i hated. Mr. Anonymous just gets off on hurting people. defeat him by not getting hurt...
Don't let Mr. A get you down. Think of him like the little devil on your shoulder who tells you all the bad things about yourself. But don't forget that there is also an angel or two sitting on your other shoulder helping you out. I wish you success, happiness and inner peace as we get ready to ring in 2011.
Happy 2011, Tui~~~~
pussyholes chuck, dont let them get you down, them bitter anonymous types are the ones in real life who would keep their heads down and keep walking rather than stand by their cancerous views....FUCK EM....
anonymous (but not really - i bet you can guess who!)
Many thanks for all the lovely comments,
Happy 2011 to you too Eric :)
Lola Dragon, good for you, I know how fucking tough it is. You have a lot to be proud of. If you need support from some seriously smart and caring drug addicts in all stages of use and recovery, I highly recommend opiophile.us/forum
Thanks again, and much love to all of you. The fact some of you have read this silly blog for many years and still drop by for my infrequent updates blows my little mind.
tui
I think you're great. I too am an addict and I don't have anything special about me. You write. That's so inspiring to me. To turn something horible and so taboo into something beautiful. I enjoy coming here and kind of escaping.
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