Tuesday, May 11, 2010

This one's for you Matt


I met Matt through this blog. He read from the very beginning. I don't think he ever once commented, but he sent me emails. Many, many emails. He believed so much in this fucked up junky. I knew that if I ever needed him, he was there. I found out today he's not there any more.

Matt, I'm going to miss you forever. RIP.


Anonymous Anonymous said...


5:17 AM  
Blogger dave said...

I found you on opiophile... and just stayed up for hours reading your whole blog... You just remind me so much of myself... I'm glad I did this. I also enjoyed the percs as I read this. I would have e-mailed you, but I haven logged into blogger for 10 years.

Excuse my offtopic post. RIP Matt.

5:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm new to this bog, it's pretty interesting but I'm wondering - are you living in NZ? Because you portray a side to this country I've never seen. Must be a clicky circle.
- John

7:23 AM  
Blogger Michelle's Spell said...

Hey Tui,

So sorry to hear about your friend. There's nothing worse, really, than the loss and nothing comforting to say except that I'm sending lots of love your way.

7:25 PM  
Blogger Joey said...

I am so, so sorry. Life is terrible and awful and hard. Sometimes we meet people who make things just a bit easier. Worth it, even. Sometimes you're that person for someone else, and you don't even know it.


3:52 AM  
Blogger david said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

5:56 AM  
Anonymous danny said...

tui its danny from the o/p

5:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Miss u

2:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey you.. its chris/michael.... i still read you.. all the time.. and i still think back to montreal when we met. email me... entropy00@hotmail.com.. im so sorry for your loss..

4:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So I got a computer several years ago and lost track of your blog. Just found it again to find out nothing has changed except the data of your entry and the name of the guy. Still wasting your life as a junkie loser. How sad.

5:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You all know how it is, when your addiction stops nibbling and starts chomping up your life.

Suddenly the fun is gone. You're draining your bank account, borrowing off friends and pawning stuff just to stay well. Even if you're on maintenance of some kind, you can't rest til you've had that hit. You're chasing that elusive rush of goodness BAM, when all the dirt and debt and stress melts away. But even on pay-day, when you splurge, you just get log-like. Sure you're stoned, but the euphoria is gone.

Maybe you're so used to it you just can't feel it anymore. You feel like a fucking idiot, spending so much money just to feel 'normal'. Every hit is more depressing than euphoric. Still, you keep hoping this time, this time...

And then, it happens. The shot, sniff, glug, plug, that swallows you with a ding! ding! ding! The one you've been waiting for. And you post a garbled thread on opiophile saying praise the lord.

So you're happy that you get high one out of how many times???? You're pathetic.

6:33 PM  
Blogger Michelle's Spell said...

Hey Tui,

Missing you and hoping you're okay. Sending you lots of love!

12:37 PM  

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