Thursday, February 18, 2010

The day I met John Mayer

Not a photoshop job. Pretty awesome.

Somehow I attract vagabond-types, the odd, the mentally insane. The streets in this area are clogged with shiny bmw suvs in modern colours, their obnoxious drivers pulling into their obnoxious mansions. There are weirdos of course, but not many of the kind people desperately-ignore, with teeth rotting out of their heads.

They get me with a question, and once they have my attention, they're hard to peel off. I had a friend in New York who would just yell fuck off until they slunk away. I'm just not tough enough for that.

On Monday, I was accompanied on a 20 minute walk to the bank, and back again, by a severely paranoid, 40 year old conspiracy theorist. Interestingly, he had a lot of advice for me. A homeless motivational speaker. Listening to him talk was fascinating. He was hyper aware of life's little things, and darkly resentful about his past. I contributed the occasional nod. All he really wanted, was to be heard.

It was a challenge extricating myself from his company. Fortunately those sorts of characters don't have cell phones. I have an odd English-like politeness I can't shake, which results in me giving my phone number (under pressure) to people I really don't want to hear from.

As we walked along, he'd target people to ask for a couple of dollars for "gas", a cigarette, or both. It wasn't lost on me that he yielded the best results with pretty young women. They would look from him to me, and back. I tried to look blasé. Having slimy, stained, toothless drug addict acquaintances approach me in public before, I recognized the strange looks. Not all drug addicts maintain a guise like I do.

The last person you'd expect, that's me.

Paper art, so intricate. Not sure who the artist was, or who had that much patience.

Oh, and John Mayer's been getting such a bad time in the press, if you go with the media slant, this may as well be him.


Blogger Michelle's Spell said...

Hi Tui,

Glad to hear your voice again! Sounds like quite the encounter -- I tend to get the talkers as well which I kind of like as long as it doesn't last too long, get too creepy. Yeah, John M. seems to have made a bit of a hash of it. I did read the Playboy interview and didn't think anything he said was truly scandalous, just a lot of unpleasant visuals. (Pictures of three hundred vaginas before he leaves the bed in the morning -- yikes!) I guess there's both good and bad sides of being honest. Hope you're having a good week!

6:55 PM  
Blogger 有甚麼新歌 said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:27 AM  
Blogger paul said...

Hey T,
I think you remember my last name. My email is 2 m's in the counts name.


5:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So, still getting high, still a loser...

5:50 PM  
Blogger elliot said...

fuck anonymous. I think your brilliant. I lost touch of your blog sometime in 2007 and I found it again today. It made me happy to read your blog again. I read that you liked sylvia plath. I was wondering if you were a fan of anne sexton? I look forward to reading all of your posts that I missed the last three years.

8:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

5:24 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love your blog and read it all the time. I look forward to every new post!

6:46 PM  
Blogger rX said...

"fuck anonymous. I think your brilliant."

I agree!! :)

Hope you're ok, look forward to more stories sooooooooon!

4:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

7:56 AM  

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