MONEY

I was 9. Sitting on the couch, knees together. Looking around the room, wide-eyes. So this is what being rich is. Big everything. Couches, walls, windows. The flag out the front. Even the family was big. Big and fat. They owned a North American fast food chain. They were North American. They were loud. "Look how SHY she is. So PRETTY! She should play with Jimmy." My tummy clenched. "Go play with Jimmy love." I looked at my parents. They nodded at me from over their coffees. Go on. I was practically an only child, my new brother was just a few months old. I was used to sitting with the adults. And, I hadn't liked the way Jimmy had looked. I didn't want to play with him. I didn't want to be alone with him. "Go on Tui."

I opened the door to his room reluctantly. It was an attic room. It was messy and there were oversized toys everywhere. His stomach pressed against his plaid shirt. I picked up a toy fire engine, trying to seem comfortable. "Want to see my penis?" He asked. I ran halfway down the stairs to the adults. Shocked and crying a bit, at the injustice of having to play with him. I sat there for a long time. Until it seemed normal for me to come back from playing. Then over to my mother, leaning against her, fingers twirling in her hair. Trying to tell her, trying to whisper. "What's she saying?" Jimmy's mother demanded. "JIMMY... Tui wants to play with you!" I put my thumb in my mouth and shook my head.

I wanted to go home. There weren't any seats near my parents, I had to sit on the other side of the big room. Jimmy came to get me. "No thank-you," I said. "Tui!" The adults exclaimed. "Don't be rude." Dad said to me. He apologized to Jimmy"s rich parents.

In the car on the way home I wasn't talked to. I had embarrassed everyone.